5 Green Lights- Vancouver Mental Health Talk

Today, I would like to share something I have learned—not from books, but from my counseling room.

I have worked with clients who have been through a lot: like multiple car accidents, brain fog to concussions. And let me tell you, sometimes the far distance in the world might just be… from the bed to the washroom. And, it might take years to recover. Because it is not just physical. It is emotional, mental, and even social.

In those early counseling sessions, while listening, I quietly scan for what I call 5 Green Lights—clues that tell me how someone’s recover journey.

🟢 Green light number one: Gratitude.

If, half an hour in, they have not started complaining, and instead say, “I’m just glad I’m here,” or “I’m grateful I survived,”—That’s a powerful sign of hope. Gratitude, even after trauma, tells me the person still sees light in the dark. If they can add a bit of humour, that is a strong sign to show a positive mindset.

🟢 Green light number two: Emotional resilience.

They may tell me with tears about the hurt they’ve been through, but they speak calmly. They are not blaming the world or themselves. They’re grounded, even in the storm. That is a wide window of tolerance—they can navigate the waves with resilience. They can sit with hard feelings, without pushing them. They are not running from the wave; they are learning to surf it.

🟢 Green light number 3: Healthy habits.

“How’s your sleep and diet? How often do you move your body?” if a client tells me they love exercise, that's amazing. Because they have a better mind body connection. It shows they are paying attention to their body—they are also more likely to take care of their heart and mind. It’s all connected. They have great foundation, self care routine and self compassion, their recovery will be amazingly faster.

I was told, how running help people get through tough times like divorce. Research showed, running is one of the natural antidepressants.

🟢 Green light number 4: Support.

“Who’s in your corner? Who can you call when things are hard?”If someone smiles and says, “My friend checks in every week and we cook together” or “I love my job—I can’t wait to go back,”—that’s gold. That tells me they have people have their back, Isolation slows recovery; connection speeds it up.

Now, if someone spends ten minutes and even using curse words, talking about a toxic workplace or a mean friend, that’s usually a red flag. It means they might feel stuck or isolated, which are enemy to recovery.

🟢 Green light number 5: A balanced life plate.

Now I invite you to think about your life plate.

Not your dinner plate—but the plate that holds everything: your work, health, relationships, hobbies, rest.

Some people serve themselves 90% work, 5% stress, and 5% drama. Wait, when was I smile last time?

That’s like going to a buffet and loading your whole plate with potatoes. Where’s dessert and greens? 

Balance is key, it is not ideal to burnout before even make it to the nursing home or staying in a fancy nursing home without any visitors.

We often say: spend your time like you spend your money. Don’t invest it all in one place. Your wellbeing is made of many perspectives: emotional, social, financial. If one area takes over, the whole plate off balance.

These 5 green lights help me see how someone ‘s recover timeline. These are the people who show up with a smiling face, who keep pushing forward even when things get tough. They have a sense of calm and hope. And these people usually do well in life.

Let me share a story that stuck with me.

We have something called MAiD—Medical Assistance in Dying. One older gentleman chose that path. Not only because of pain, but more likely because he was alone. He was on kidney treatment. Imagine no one visits and no one is waiting at home.

That kind of loneliness? It can feel heavier when you battled the disease.

That’s why: Build your village—before you need it. It takes time. Find that friend who’ll sneak you chocolate in the nursing home. The one who makes you laugh when you feel like the end of the world. The one who shows up and stays when it matters. We heal faster when we’re not alone.

So what can we do?

✨ Keep a grateful heart.

✨ Improve Emotional resilience

✨ Build small, healthy habits.

✨ Grow your support system.

And check your plate. Don’t let stress take over joy, connection, and rest.

Here’s my challenge for you: right now, think of one small thing you could do. Maybe reach out to a friend, go for a mindful walk or try to write down your 2 am people list.

And maybe you could be someone else’s green light. Check on your people. Especially the “strong” ones.

Smile more. A smile is a beautiful gift—to yourself and those around you. You never know what people have been through next to you.

Now there is a great volunteer program helps drive cancer patient to hospital. Recovery is never just about treatment—it’s about togetherness. Let’s light up each other with more green lights.